Sunday, December 27, 2015

Stunt Zombie's Christmas Fallout 2015!

Hello all! I hope you all had a merry Christmas or happy holiday. I know I sure did, even if I had to wake up at the ass crack of dawn to work the day of. That's okay though, because when I got home, my lovely wife had a nice big Bloody Mary and a delicious breakfast waiting for me when I walked into the door. You can't ask for much more than that. 

This year, we decided to go a little lighter on the presents. As we get older, we find ourselves wanting less and less stuff. Closets and bookshelves are already full to overflowing, and I hate adding to the clutter. So, the Christmas haul was a bit smaller, but by no means was it less awesome. 

The stocking's always come first. It's been a tradition since I was young, and it continues to be one among Chelsea and I. This year, I got a fancy new Star Wars stocking. It's even in my favorite color! Double win! And, where there's a stocking, there's candy..

There's a little bit of everything in there. My perennial favorites, Reese's Peanut Butter trees, as well as some Star Wars Jelly Belly, TMNT chocolate, candy pizzas and tissues, Avengers chocolate and sour straws, and Justice League fun dip type stuff. It's enough to either rot my teeth, or give me a heart attack before New Year's Eve. Probably both. I'm just a little ashamed to admit that there was a lot more in that stocking when I first opened it. Also, in the interest of full disclosure, that box of Star Wars gummies is empty. 

I also got my yearly allotment of Royal Dansk Butter Cookies. I sang the praises of my favorite cookies last year, and my feelings toward them haven't changed. I can't bring myself to eat them any other time of the year, and it really doesn't feel like the Christmas season if I don't have a tin of these to munch on when I'm watching Christmas Vacation. Chelsea also gave me one of those sausage and cheese sampler packs, another one of my seasonal favorites. Speaking of sausages and cheeses..

My mom gave us two more of those Hickory Farms packs, along with what has to be the largest cheese and sausage sampler packs I've ever seen. This pack came from a company called The Swiss Colony, and it looks like it has enough to feed a village. This isn't even everything, since we've been munching on it since Christmas Eve. Oddly enough, even though it contained no less than 4 pounds of pasteurized cheeses and salted meat, they didn't include any crackers. Weird. The Swiss Colony sampler also included various snack cakes, chocolate covered nuts, jellies, and some Christmas colored gum drops. It's a one stop shop for your entire cocktail party. 

We also got three large containers full of nuts. At this rate, I won't have to buy any snacks until April or May.

Okay, this is the last of the food, I promise. You can't walk into a grocery store without tripping over something with Star Wars plastered all over it. Even Campbell's got into the act, slapping droids and Stormtroopers on cans of chicken soup. The small tin in the middle is full of cotton swabs, not mints as I originally expected. Last, I got a small tumbler emblazoned with characters from the original trilogy. That's one thing I've noticed about all the promotional tie-ins. They don't seem to feature any of the new characters. Strange..

If this year had a theme, it would definitely be Star Wars. This shirt was a gift from one of Chelsea's friends, and it's already becoming one of my favorites. It's sort of a mashup between Darth Vader's helmet and the Death Star. I'm realizing how much of a missed opportunity it was for the Empire to not make the Death Start's look like a giant Vader head. There's no way a ragtag bunch of Rebels would ever mistake that for a moon. Now I can't stop thinking how awesome it would be to have a gigantic planet destroying Vader face flying through space. 

He died 15 minutes into Return of the Jedi, but that hasn't kept Boba Fett from showing up on just about everything. I normally get annoyed by these kinds of mashups, but I'll make an exception for this one. I can sort of picture Boba tearing around Tattooine in his roadster, listening to some tunes, and just letting his helmet air out. Note to Disney: There's no need to go back and add this to the original movies. Don't make the special editions more special-er. 

Books! Not a year goes by without me getting books, and you won't hear me complaining. I wanted Archie Vs. Predator because it sounded utterly ridiculous, and it really was. Don't go in looking for a smart read, because you won't find it here. What you will find is a lot of stupid, gory fun. The unbeatable Squirrel Girl collects the first few issues of her regular series, and it has quickly become my favorite new comic. It's nice to be able to read a comic about a female superhero, and not feel perverted because her costume only covers her crotch and nipples. If I had one main complaint about comics, it's that some of them take themselves way too seriously. Not a problem with Squirrel Girl. It's easily the funniest book I've ever read. I laughed out loud quite a bit while I was reading it, prompting my wife to ask me what was wrong. You'd think I never laughed around her..

The book on the bottom is the comic adaptation of the first TMNT movie. I've owned the adaptation of the second movie since it came out, but this one always eluded me. This is the hardback version, and I'm looking forward to seeing if there were any scenes that weren't in the movie. I, Zombie isn't based on the show of the same name. Rather, it's told from the perspective of the undead. I haven't had a chance to crack it open yet, but it sounds like it's going to be a fun read. Maybe I'll do a book report when I'm done. 

Moving on, we have something sharp and My old digital Casio is still ticking, but it's looking a little rough. So, Chelsea bought me a watch that can take a licking and keep on ticking, and look good doing it. She also gave me the little Buck knife there, because it's not always polite to whip out a machete when you need to slice some sausage and cheese to put on your crackers. 

Last, and certainly not least, an Amazon Kindle! I actually already have a Fire, but trying to read books on the damn thing gives me a headache. If you're outside, you might as well forget about it. So, Santa Chelsea was nice enough to slip one of these under the tree for me. I'm a voracious reader, so it'll be nice to not have to worry about stacks of books sprouting up all around the house. 

So, there you have it. Another year, another Christmas gone by. The day after is always the worst. The radio stations stop playing Christmas music, stores start putting out Valentine's day crap, and all the turkey stuffing is gone. It's like waking up from a dream where you're rolling around in money, only to wake up and find you were just lying in a pile of bills. You shouldn't let that diminish the love for the day. If anything, we should embrace it, and try to pack as much enjoyment in as possible.  

If you'd like to see some other Christmas fallouts, the go check out these other blogs. Some haven't posted their hauls yet, but you should just go check out their blogs anyway. 


  1. Very nice Chris...just a ton of snacks! Yum!

    1. I know the feeling,Chris.What a difference a day makes.The day after Christmas is always a bit of a downer for me too.We're keeping our tree up until new years ,so that helps a little.Nice haul,man ;)

    2. We're doing the same actually. We'll take it down next week, and toss the tree on the burn pile. It's become something of a tradition to burn the Christmas tree on our first bonfire, to kind of usher in Spring.

  2. I love the irony of getting both books AND a kindle. Although, you'd never find that sweet TMNT movie adaptation on the kindle! There are some real gems in that comic - lemme know when you read it!

    1. I have yet to have a good comic experience on a tablet. Maybe I've just used the wrong tablets.

      As much as I love the Kindle, I still love the feeling of holding a book in my hands. It'll come in handy for trips though, where I don't want to carry a bunch of books.

      I may not find the comic adaptation of the TMNT movie on a Kindle, but I bet I can find the novelization. ;-)

  3. Candy candy candy!! I haven't checked the grocery section at the supermarket, so I'm afraid of missing candy that comes with Star Wars Stickers :(

    1. I don't think you have to worry about not finding candy with Star Wars stickers anymore ;). I have a feeling it will be around for a long time.


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